My hamster died.

Friday night I realized I hadn’t seen him for awhile. That isn’t unusual as hamsters are nocturnal and I wouldn’t always see him in the evenings. I figured I should check his water but when I lifted the lid from his cage and he didn’t poke his little nose out to see what was going on (like he always did in the past) I knew he was gone. I looked in his usual spots and he wasn’t there. I found him under his sand bath, burrowed into the bedding. I uncovered him enough to know that he was there and definitely not moving.

My roommate was kind enough to “take care of it” for me as I can’t handle those sorts of things.

I know I should be sad over the loss of a pet, but honestly, I’m not. Even when i was cleaning up all his stuff, I didn’t really feel anything. I feel like a terrible person for not caring, but really, I was never able to bond with him. I tried, I really did, but he would bite me more often than not.

Previously, my roommate said that we could get a dog after the hamster passed away. We haven’t talked about it yet, but we set up a joint account as a “dog fund” some time ago so we have money ready for getting dog supplies and the adoption fee.

Other than that, life moves on as usual.